An Open Letter to Adoptees

Dearly beloved adopted one,

I was born almost 46 years ago, shortly after the passage of Roe v. Wade to a teen mom who had no job, no family support, no ability to provide for me, and no power to protect me from her harmful environment.  Thirteen months later, I was adopted into a loving family who had been waiting and praying for me for over five years. As I look back on my life story as only God could have written it, I am overwhelmed by God's sovereignty, goodness, and love. I would like to encourage you with a few lessons I have learned as an adoptee who was born during an era when crisis pregnancies and adoptions were far less common than they are now.

Your life is sacred. You are an infinitely valuable, good gift from the Lord!  

Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb a reward. (Psalm 127:3)

Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change.(James 1:17) 

You are a miracle, not a mistake!  

Your parents may not have planned your conception, but your perfect heavenly Father planned every detail of your life and your being long before you were ever conceived.  (Psalm 139: 13-16)

God has a perfect plan and purpose for your life. 

For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. (Jeremiah 29:11)

God chose the date, time, and place for your birth in accordance with His perfect plan (Psalm 18:30), and His plans are always good (Luke 18:19).  He rejoices over you endlessly with love so vast, none can fully comprehend it.  (Learn more about God's love for you here.)  God fashioned you with all the gifts and abilities you will need to fulfill His wonderful purposes for your life.

You were never abandoned. You are and always have been lavishly loved.

Your birth mother did not give you up because she did not want you. She placed you up for adoption because she loved you more than herself. She chose to give you life even when it was incredibly inconvenient and uncomfortable for her. She endured great physical and emotional pain as she labored to deliver you. Giving you up for adoption was undoubtedly the biggest sacrifice of her life, but she made that sacrifice out of love.

Consider the parable of the talents as described in Matthew 25.  While you are worth infinitely more than any of the talents (one talent was worth approximately 20 years of  daily wages) the rich man in this parable entrusted to his three servants, you were indeed a gift of immeasurable value entrusted to your birth parents by God Almighty.  Your birth mother had to make a choice.  She could have buried you as the fearful servant did (except she would have "buried" you via abortion), which may have seemed on the surface to be the safest, easiest option, but the result would have been great loss, weeping, and "gnashing of teeth".  Alternatively, she could have chosen to parent you herself. That option would have involved some risk on her part and years of sacrifice, but both of you would have reaped rewards (Proverbs 17:3).  That choice would have returned some blessings while sparing your birth mother the agonizing heartache and unknowns of entrusting her precious gift into the arms of strangers, but it would not have provided you with all the opportunities, stability, and nurture you could have received by being raised by both a mother and a father in a stable, loving home.  Instead of burying you or taking some risks to give you what little she felt she could provide you, she took the biggest risk of all and made the greatest sacrifice of love possible. Instead of forsaking you or investing her treasure into lower risk, lower yield "bonds", she gave up all the love and joy you could have brought her to give you more than she ever thought she could.  She was a faithful steward of God's precious gift.

A mother's love for her child is limitless, powerful, and sacrificial. She gave up her greatest treasure so that you may have the most abundant life possible.  Such great love comes not from the flesh, but from God who sent His only Son away from Heaven and down to earth, so that He could dwell with us as both God and man and suffer and die on the cross for all our sins.  Her sacrifice was also rooted in faith, for we know that God will never leave or forsake us. (Deuteronomy 31:8)

You are chosen!

When I was in elementary school and kids would tease me or ask me questions about being adopted, I would tell them, "I wasn't abandoned; I was chosen. My parents could have chosen anyone to be their daughter, but they chose me. Your parents didn't have that choice. They were stuck with you."  My childish reply may have seemed snarky, and I in no way want to diminish the love any mother has for her child regardless of choice or circumstance, but adopted children are indeed chosen. I had absolutely nothing to offer my adoptive parents except sleepless nights, dirty diapers, and years of hard labor and ongoing expenses.  Yet, they chose me as their own. They gave me their name, their identity, their inheritance, their endless devotion, and most importantly, their unconditional love.

The day my parents chose me

Adoption is a beautiful picture of our spiritual adoption in Christ.  God chose each of us to become a part of His family even when we were sinners with nothing to offer Him in return. He gave up His own Son to redeem us.  He loves us unconditionally and generously provides all we need. He gives us a new identity in Him. When we come to Him in faith, he gives us a new name and an eternal inheritance.  Just as I grew to speak, act, and even look more like my adopted parents, God transforms us into His likeness as we abide with Him as His children. (Ephesians 1:3-14)

You were never fatherless.

God created you with a yearning that only He can fill, for He desires to have a close, personal relationship with you as your Daddy. He is your perfect, holy, and good Father.  His heart's desire is that you will come to Him for peace, comfort, rest, and joy.  His arms are open wide waiting for all His children to come to Him as a child confidently approaches his or her earthly father.  No matter why your earthly father chose to no longer be a part of your life, you must know that you were never fatherless. God intended for your adoptive father be your earthly daddy all along, but no earthly father can ever compare to God.  He will meet your every need, wipe away every tear, and protect you with His omnipotent hands. (Psalm 68:5)



Disclaimer:
I realize that each adoption story is unique, and some may be filled with trials and heartaches.  Not all adoptions are idyllic. However, we must not believe Satan's lies. The enemy of our souls seeks to impede our walk with Christ and keep us from God's purpose by convincing us that we are unloved, abandoned, or alone, contrary to God's absolute truth.  The media prefers to highlight sensational worst case scenarios since those are most profitable for them, but we must not assume such rare, isolated scenarios apply to us. Our individual adoption stories are still unfolding, and God always keeps His promises.

The mistake that leads to a path of destruction

I am begging every young woman and parent of a daughter to read Abby Johnson's response below.

[Abby Johnson is a former Director of a Planned Parenthood affiliate and was Planned Parenthood's Employee of the Year for the entire US who walked away from her enormous salary and Planned Parenthood power when she saw a 13-week abortion take place on an ultrasound. She had two abortions of her own and was complicit in manipulating women to undergo 22,000 abortions before God changed her heart. Now she is fighting tirelessly to support women in crisis and to save the unborn while helping women heal after abortion and helping abortion workers leave the industry. Her true story can be viewed in the movie "Unplanned" showing at movie theaters now.]

In an interview with Glenn Beck, Abby Johnson was asked, "Where did you make your mistake?" She replied, "I made my mistake when I went to college, and I started living a life of IMMODESTY in my speech, my behavior, my dress. I saw that attracted the attention of guys, and that was attention I wanted."

Dear young ladies, while I would love for you to care about guys enough to avoid becoming a stumbling block or a source of temptation for them, I am much more interested in YOU personally. Instead of asking you to consider others before yourself, let's just consider you for a moment. What's in your best interest? Even if all the godly guys manage to look away when you walk by in that skimpy outfit (that's his responsibility, not yours, as you like to tell me), there are far more jerks, perverts, and creepy old men who will feast their eyes on your physical beauty for a free thrill without ever regarding your heart, mind, or soul. Lots of desperate women require men to pay top dollar to see their goods, but you are putting much of yours on display for free, both in person and on social media. Only your future husband who respects you so much that he has committed himself wholly to you until death (or Christ's return) deserves that privilege. The immature guys whose attention you gain will look at you as an object, more than once, and they will prey on you. You are setting yourself up to be manipulated, used, and abused over and over again. You think you can handle them, but scientific studies show that repeated pressure will eventually wear you down. The jerks you attract with your immodest words, actions, or dress will lead you down a path of so many regrets. Modesty isn't just a wise choice to help out the good guys, it is the best way to love and respect yourself!

www.yourhealthsourceblog.org/

Ten Truths about Planned Parenthood

I have shared the information below with women in crisis pregnancy situations and with their significant others. I have written extensively about it when I worked as a freelance writer. I have even spoken to students and public high school principals about it, but few were willing to believe that Planned Parenthood manipulates women to the extent that they do. Perhaps hearing it from Abby Johnson, a former Planned Parenthood director and Employee of the Year for all the Planned Parenthood centers in the US, would add some credibility.

Abby Johnson

1. Planned Parenthood comes into schools for the sole purpose of selling abortions. They build relationships of trust with students, encourage them to engage in risky sexual activity, and dole out contraceptives that will FAIL. Not only is the human error rate extremely high for young people, but they deliberately give out contraceptives with the highest failure rates. That sense of false security increases sexual activity. Their goal is to sell each girl they meet in the schools at least 3 abortions before they turn 30. That is the only reason Planned Parenthood comes into schools with their "sex ed" programs.
2. IPPF has manipulated nations around the world into accepting the Convention on the Rights of the Child for the purpose of stripping parental rights so that children can have abortions without parental consent. All this political activism is for the purpose of selling more abortions. (Not discussed in video but more information is available here.)
3. Abortion is Planned Parenthood's bread and butter. Each Planned Parenthood center is given abortion sales quotas with financial incentives for meeting and exceeding them. No quotas are given for the other services. Every other service they offer, many of which are funded by government grants, are ultimately designed to gain women's trust so they can eventually sell them more abortions. Planned Parenthood directors and execs have gotten filthy rich from the blood of manipulated women in crisis and from the death of those women's innocent children.
4. Every elected representative who voted against the Born Alive Act, which only sought to prevent infanticide after a baby has been born alive after a botched abortion, received significant campaign contributions from Planned Parenthood. The International Planned Parenthood Federation (IPPF) is one of wealthiest and most powerful organizations in the world. IPPF manipulates politicians to vote against the will of their constituents when it will help IPPF sell more abortions. (Not discussed in video, but more information is available here.)
5. Planned Parenthood's name is a misnomer. No client walks out of Planned Parenthood offices with a planned pregnancy. IPPF exists to terminate pregnancy, not support it. They offer clients no prenatal services whatsoever except for the pregnancy test itself which they use to sell abortion.
6. The undercover videos about selling baby body parts were not isolated events. Baby body parts are sold across the nation. Abby's one affiliate earned over $2.5 million a year from the sale of baby body parts (or "pieces of children" as Abby's affiliate referred to them) alone.
7. Abortion counselors LIE to their patients to convince them to buy an abortion. "Counselors" receive sales training and have scripted responses for virtually every patient concern to deliberately pressure these women into having an abortion. Women with faith based concerns about abortion are told that God will forgive them because He understands their situation. Patients do not receive counseling at Planned Parenthood. They receive a sales pitch. Christian crisis pregnancy centers like the CareNet center where I served do provide patients with legitimate counseling and a full list of options plus hope, support, encouragement, and love.
8. Planned Parenthood sets much higher quotas for the abortion pill, RU486, because it takes less of their time and yields higher margins. It is not at all safe or comfortable as they claim. It's excruciatingly painful, involves so much blood loss that many patients fear they might die, and causes continued blood clots for up to 8 weeks afterwards. Furthermore, it doesn't always expel all of the baby, so patients may need to come back for the surgical procedure, leaving them to pay for and recover from both the chemical and the surgical abortion.
9. Candela suction abortions are much safer if used with an ultrasound to guide the placement of the instrument, but many Planned Parenthood facilities do not use ultrasound during the procedure because it takes an extra three minutes per abortion and requires an extra helping hand. Abby's facility performed 30-50 abortions a day, so they cut corners wherever possible to fit in more abortions.
10. Ultrasounds are used during the initial examination to determine the size/age of the baby which then determines the cost of the abortion. Patients are not shown the ultrasound images of their babies on purpose. (CareNet crisis pregnancy centers offer ultrasound images so moms can see their babies for free, and that image often changes their mind about the abortion.)

 Listen to Abby as she shares her experiences in this eye-opening video: